One of “those” people

How do you become one of “those people.”  I don’t mean Rich and Famous. Although the rich does play a part in it. Where’s the place in the world where the casual average people rub shoulders with the elite, and judgement does not exist?  

I don’t care if your family owns a company. When you need to change your scenery because of your personal goal, how do you do so?  Moving is not the answer. 

I want to meet the man who is driven and kind and funny and energetic and spontaneous. Match.com. Yeah those guys aren’t changing. POF is down right slimy at times. 

You guessed it “Adult Overrated” at its best. Where did that boy who punched me in the arm on the school bus go?  That’s a way to get a girls attention. 

The Married Man

There he is. I work with him. He’s nice enough, maybe a bit older… but still a reality. Well, not really. He’s married. So no reason to consider him. 

And then he flirts. I know better of course. Never thought of even flirting with a married guy. But this one is in my head.  And I believe he’s happily married. Leave it at that. Don’t consider anything else. But he flirts more – and puts the offer out there. 

So how do I get him out of my head!?

It’s been awhile

So it’s that transition point. I’ve been single for awhile. Now I’ve decided I don’t need anyone. I find fault with all men. How long does this last? Do you come back from this stage… or is this the beginning of the crazy cat lady stage?

The Dating Life…

So I’ve been single and dating for a few months now. I need to know when things changed so dramatically. When did we think let’s have sex first then talk?? Apparently that’s it. 

Did all females turn against relationships? Guys have always been about getting a piece. Not that girls are against it. But – WHERE THE HELL DID ROMANCE GO??

Because we sit side by side on my couch does not guarantee you are getting laid. Ugh. I think it’s all changing in the dating world. And it’s not one I want to be a part of. Hold my hand. Kiss me good night. I promise if I want more I will take it further.

It’s DATING OVERRATED. UGH. 

The nice girl

So what happens to the nice girl?  Nice guys finish last. Chicks too?  Or is it more like you never finish. You are alone and stalled. 

Can you tell the kind of night I’m having?  Tinder. I’ve been on it and geez can that get old quick. Who knows if anyone likes me because I barley like anyone. POF. so I put in the age range in looking for. Your 15 years or more over that. And you think I’m a bitch because I’m not interested? Or you’re barely legal. Sweetheart find someone your age. Ugh. So are all the nice guys married?

I put my heart out there. And i get burned. I’m actually nice to others and can hold a conversation. I’m successful. I thought that was a good thing, but in reality it makes them run. 
So to the 35-4 year old men. Grow up. Pull up your pants, and buy some clothes that fit. Dress to impress. No one wants a 36 year old thug who thinks he’s in high school. Cut your hair and shave. Pretend you know how to be presentable. You all want the perfect arm candy so try being it! 

Ugh. Men. So overrate. 

Fairytales Ruined Me

That’s right. I blame all those happily ever after stories. 

Prince Charming isn’t real. He’s an oversized child who depends on his parents. Or he’s a player who’s playing games to get some. Maybe you will find one, but then they run at the idea of the next step. 

Men stopped being men. Women, in the need to care for and be there for our men, have stepped in and picked up the pieces they drop. And now fairytales are non-existent. 

Being an adult is overrated. 

The Cowboy

So here’s to going outside my comfort zone. Online Dating. Ugh. It feels dirty. Somehow a bar seems more natural. Ok, well either way isn’t good!

“Like”👍🏻

“Swipe Right”➡️

“Wink”😉

This is not dating. And yet I managed to hit “Super Like🌟.” Mutual Match! 

Every girl wants a real man!

The cowboy is handsome from online. He’s perfect in writing. Common interest. Common friends. Except – my best friend doesn’t like him. She doesn’t know about this online thing, so I’m not sure yet why. They’re in the same business. I’m not ready to find out why. I just want to have hope of a normal relationship for five minutes.  Is that asking a lot? 

So we chatted online. We exchanged numbers. We text. 

And then he vanished. I’m confrontational and need answers… So I asked why?  A quick apology, and an explanation. That’s fair. Then nothing again. This is days into it. Why am a freaking out? Oh right, I’m the damaged one now. Ugh. So it’s time to ride it out. 

I’ll keep swiping and liking for now. The matches the more stories. And so dating begins. Adult overrated. 

Single Again

Yup. It’s true. The stories stopped for awhile. I went back to the “safe” choice. The one who couldn’t give me what I wanted, but was by my side. I wasn’t alone. It was short lived. It gave me time to recognize that he wasn’t what I needed in my life. I’m driven and successful. He’s lazy and unmotivated. It was better this time. We didn’t yell, scream or cry. I explained that I needed more. I haven’t seen him in over a month. I miss having someone here, but not him. All this time and he messaged me to say he’s working on things. We were together for years and now you’re working on them?? 

And so I move on in life. Not as a cheater. Not as a liar. As an adult which is so overrated. 

Looking forward to hello!

Foot Down

So I finally put my foot down to the current guy. We’re done. You made promise after promise to me and have done nothing. His response? I have even if you don’t believe me. Get a car – are you hiding the damn thing?  Get a better job – do you still go to your crap job for fun?? Grow up – you have to call mommy every day WHY? 

Now don’t get me wrong… I miss him. I wanted the future, but those were three key details I needed. We’ve been together for years. HE HAS A CURFEW. We are in our thirties!! I’m not unreasonable. Enough is enough. So now he sulks around telling everyone how he is a failure. He doesn’t fix it. Just complains. Poor him. 

So why the hell am I still waiting for the miracle transformation?  Why can’t I move past him? High school relationships were easier. Break up. Move on. This whole Adult thing is Over Rated 

And not in a good way!

The Ex’s

So we all have the perfect man in our sight, but what about our relationships? My breakdown:

EX #1: Not Worth The Time – this was the older guy I dated in high school and the beginning of college. What was great about him? He was nice. Everything else was a fail!  No car, no job, no future. Moving on…

EX #2: “First Love” – again the older guy. He spoiled me and offered the idea of a future. And cheated on me. With a friend. Who he married. And still cheats on. Moving on…

EX #3: The Ex Husband – ok so he made it pretty far. He was my best friend for the relationship. And we had so much fun. Then we had our son. And I became mommy. My priority changed and his anger flared. He wasn’t number one in my life, and as much as he loved his son… It wasn’t something we repaired. Divorce sucked. We were not nice to each other. Fast forward many years and we get alone 80% of the time. Moving on…

EX #4: Heartless – this relationship lasted awhile, but his heart was never really in it. He was great to me and my son but warned me he never wanted to get married. Scorned by his ex. End of my happily ever after story. Moving on…

EX #5: The player – this one sucks. He wasn’t a “real” relationship. More of the friends with benefits. But damn, we had amazing chemistry. Everyone who saw us hanging out wanted us to be that couple. He was stuck on a volatile girl. And he was never getting over her. FYI they are having a baby next month!  Moving on…

EX #6: The Heartbreaker – this is the one who cracks my heart a little more every day. He started off as all I could want. He promised the future. He wanted the same things. We had fun. My son loved him. Years into it I have realized that he hasn’t actually done anything towards his promises. He’s been dragging me along. And when I gave him the chance to fix it, he threw a temper tantrum. He says he’s doing it all. But still nothing to show for it. He makes it like I’m wrong for pushing for those things. You promised you would do it years ago!! Ugh. 

The last one is a problem. I hold onto the hope that he’s going to get his act together and be there for me like he promised. I hate being the pushy needy girl, being an Adult is Over Rated.